His hair a dusty gold,

eyes full of thought.

He sits there reading aloud.

My eyes are cast on his face,

I cant take them off of him.

He's had my heart for over a year,

Yet he doesnt know I exist.

Could he ever feel that way if he knew me?

I can only dream of us.

But in those dreams, at least I can smile.

He looks up now, he's done.

I look away lost with words.

His are so beautiful, and i wish i knew what to say.

I wish I could tell him.

tell him the truth,

Tell him how I feel.

Tell him it all.

10-Nikii-20

2004

He took me away.

Took away my breath,

Then he took my eart.

His actions lead me on,

Then when confronted says its not real.

Im sick of how i feel.

Let him take that away.

He took it all away,

Now he took away my smile.

My feelings for him still remain.

But how come i am so angry?

Why do i hate him.

Because he took it all away.

And the only thing he left.

Pain.

10-Nikii-20

2004

You look at me and see eyes full of happiness

And a smile flashing bright.

You hear laughter in my voice.

But you dont see how he is tearing me apart.

How I can't feel the happiness you see and the laughter i fake.

You cant hear the loneliness and torment in my voice/

Just as he deceived me, I deceive you.

I pretend to be fine, pretend like I dont care.

But I do care.

I wish I could say I was over him and mean it.

I wish his face was out of my mind

And the memories went away,

or at least didnt hurt. Because it all hurts.

I wont hurt myself over him anymore though.

He isnt worth it, and maybe the meories will fade.

I wish I was really over him because the truth is

No matter how much I say I am,

I'm not over him at all.

10-Nikii-25

2004