Poems-1[oldest]

Broken Down and Waiting For The Day-Poetry

Inside meh head..

Take It Away

Her hurt,

killing me inside.

Twisting my insides,

all the chemicals in me affecting me.

The only thought on my mind.

Is she ok?

I wish i could take it all away.

Take all her pain.

Even if it killed me even more,

Just so she could feel happiness,

the happiness i've lost.

The happiness she deserves.

10-Nikii-15

2004

Time Ticks Away

I'm losing my mind in just a few minutes,

Shes yelling at me right now.

Its unfair, i didnt do anything.

After 5 minutes, i cant stand it,

I run into my room.

One minute left, my eyes are soaked with tears.

Time ticks away.

45 seconds left, and my mind is laced with bad thoughts.

Time ticks away.

30 seconds, my arm flys out to grab my blade.

Time ticks away.

Only 15 seconds left, i take the razor to my arm.

Time ticks away.

Theres 10 seconds left, the blood is flowing out again.

Time ticks away.

Only one second left as time ticks away.

The tears, the thoughts are still here.

Theres nowhere left to go,

razor still in my hand.

I've lost it completely.

Theres no time left.

What happens now?

10-Nikii-06

2004

Clouds Around Me

The dark clouds surround me,

I lie trapped in the disease.

The disease embedded in my head,

All the happiness devoured,

Pain, anger, and depression replacing it.

The clouds are so thick,

I cant see anything.

They consume me,

and all my feelings have turned around.

Why cant i get out?

Why wont it all end?

I try to escape them,

but where-ever i go,

they are there.

Its so frustrating,

and i have given up.

So i just lie here in the mess of clouds,

feeling all of the familiar feelings.

The anger, hate, and sadness have taken me over.

Its all dark now, but it doesnt matter to me.

I have learned to live with it all.

The clouds dont confuse me anymore,

Since i've given up the fight.

My energy was all gone, and i couldn't win.

It doesnt matter now.

All of my old feelings are lost.

But now i can deal with it,

and now i am lost.

Lost in the clouds that have changed me,

Made me a new person, took away the old me.

The clouds will go away,but it wont be the same,

and neither will I.

10-Nikii-05

2004

(This isnt my poem, its AFI- Selfpity. but its my fav song by them. i love it.)

i'm always short on cash and my mind is in the trash. i can't find a way to get my head out of my ass. i'm gettin' skinny as a bone 'cause i'm always stuck at home. i'm living my life all fucked up and alone. so once again, alone in my room, my only apparent future is my unhappy doom. so i just whine all the fucking time. i'm hooked bad on caffeine, unless i get it i'm mean. i can't remember last when i was chipper and clean. i'm going insane, all i do is complain. the only traits i show are depression and disdain. the girl i love is going away, there is no way that she'll stay. i don't know how i'm gonna live my life this way. don't want to have to try, i'll just sit around and cry. maybe, if i get lucky, i'll just fuckin' die.